You Know How They Say Japanese TV Is Messed Up… (NSFW)

So you know how they say Japanese TV is really strange… I was channel surfing in my hotel room while I was packing to leave Tokyo on Saturday night, and this came on the screen… To be honest I have no idea why I watched this except for complete bewilderment. It seems to me like it was a short film about a girl who was ostracized from her school because she refused to wear the school uniform. The school uniform being a bra panties and high stocking in blue so bright it made your eyes bleed.

My what the fuckomiter was going completely haywire while watching this show, it’s an all girls school with a single male teacher and some mean prefects that seems to wear slightly different clothes. At some point the girl who refuses to conform decides she’s going to sleep in a tent in the class. Which insights more bullying, and eventually the move her out of the class by collapsing the tent while she’s sleeping in it and putting it up somewhere else.

She decides to run away from the school because, you know she’s being bullied to wear clothes that she’s not comfortable wearing, and has a touching farewell with her friend where she hands her her notes, and then runs away, when her friend looks int he notes she finds a drawing of everyone who has been mean to her…

The friend feels bad about this and tells everyone that they’ve been mean to the girl, and for some reason the girl comes back and they decide that she doesn’t need to take off her clothes to be accepted. YAY! Isn’t that a lovely moral, you don’t have to take off your clothes to be popular.

Then because everyone has been so nice to her she decides that she is going to take her clothes off anyway and they all dance in a circle…

I forgot to mention she was wearing the school uniform she objected to so much under the clothes that she had been wearing throughout the entire show… How convenient…

That Auto-Correct Song


There aren’t many things that make my laugh out loud even when there is no one else in the room. The crap that gets posted onto sites like “Damn you Auto Correct” definately falls into that category though.

This song by “Ben Champion” play on that, and it’s quite amusing in it’s own right. It’s available to download on iTunes.

If you want to sing along here are the lyrics:
Verse 1

When I said I wanted to kill you,
I meant to say kiss
When I said I was going to to dump your bones in the woods,
I meant to say jump
And now you think I’m a psychopath
And our relationship is wrecked
There’s nothing I can do but put the blame on
Auto-correct.

Verse 2

You said whenever you miss me you smell my shits,
I think you meant shirts
My work was coming in slits and spritzers (sorry)
Spits and spurts
I said you were a whining spaz
When I meant to say shining star
Then I said I was going to pimp your ass
When I went to park your car
And now you think I’m a total dick
And I’m losing your respect
There’s nothing I can do but put the blame on
Auto-correct.

Verse 3

You said you like to fist with men in bars,
I think you meant flirt
Either way I think it’s safe to say
One of us is going to get hurt
I know that you don’t mind jazz
In a quiet little back street place
But you said in your message you quite like jizz
Except when it was in your face
And now it seems we’re communicating
In a brand new dialect
There’s nothing I can do but put the blame on
Auto-correct.

Middle Eight

These thumbs were not designed for typing
Maybe we should just have stuck to skyping
Now all that you can say to me
Is WTF and OMG
This song is one long apology, I admit
This phone is a fluffing piece of shut
This phone is a flecking price of slut
This phone is a trucking place of spit

Verse 4

When I said I like to use glory-holes,
I was trying to type coriander
I was looking forward to eating out
On your vagina
(Verandah, verandah, so sorry)

Now we’ve sent these messages
That we should have double-checked
There’s nothing I can do but put the blame on
Auto-erotic
Auto-erotic
Automatic
Autocratic
Sumo wrestler
Dodo forest
Dildo Carrot

Oh well, what did we expect?
We never should have put our faith in auto-correct.

Final Fantasy Ultimate Box Good Idea Bad Execution

Final Fantasy Ultimate Box packs all 13 games for $450 from PSOne to PS3, with some extra commemorative goodness

Square are releasing a 25th anniversary Final Fantasy Box Set! I’m not going to lie when I saw this my first though was wow I really wish I could afford $450 for this, then I actually read the article. In order to play this box set you have to have 4 different game consoles:

  • FFI, FFII and FFIV-FFIX are all PS One games
  • FFIII is a UMD for the PSP (So screw you if you have a PSP Go)
  • FFX, FFXI and FFXII are PS2
  • FFXIII is PS3

Discounting the fact that FFXI is an online game which is probably dead at the moment (I’ve not checked) this is still a bit cheeky. How hard would it have been to port these to the PS3? You know so you could play all these games on one system, I know older PS3 systems can play PSOne and PS2 games, but they upscale the games horribly (I’ve been playing FFIX on my PS3 and it looks terrible).

Also FFXIV isn’t included in the box? It’s hardly ultimate then is it? (You do get a pair of Moogle Earrings for your character if you happen to play FFXIV at least that’s my interpretation of the Japanese)

What about FFX-2 &FF-XIII-2? Oh they aren’t included either?

The Game Boy Final Fantasy games? We don’t talk about them…

Also of note is the fact that the PS One Final fantasy games that are rereleases of the SNES games (IV, V and VI) are suffer from really bad lag due to poor emulation and disc read requirements.

You also get a plaque but seriously 35,000 Yen? Thats a bit steep considering anyone who is actually a fan of the series will have half if not all of these already in the format they are distributed in (I think I’ve got all of them some of them in 2-3 formats).

It looks more like a “We could make a lot of money by burning ISO’s we already have to disc with some snazzy packaging because it happens to coincide with the 25th anniversary of the series” move by Squeenix rather than a move that shows they care about the fans and actually want to pay homage to the series that brought the company back from the brink of death.

Why not release this for the PS3 of the PS Vita? I’m sure the Vita can handle every one of these games apart from maybe FFXIII and even then it can probably handle that.

I’d buy a Vita that had all these games bundled with it on a memory card and I’d pay $150 -$200 more than the price of a Vita for the privilege.

I’d buy this for the PS3 if it came on 4-10 Discs and had all the games upscaled beautifully to run on my PS3 (I’m not asking for them to be re-rendered but that would also be a plus).

I’d buy remakes of Final Fantasy 4 – 9 (I’m sick of roman numerals sue me) with modern graphics, I’d probably pay the same price I would for a modern game for each of them.

What I’m not going to do is buy a bunch of games that I already own mostly in the format that I already own  them in just because they have been released in a prettier box.

Then again I’m, probably not the target audience for this, Japanese Final Fantasy fans rival Apple Fans in their devotion to the franchise, I’m sure they will eat this up. I’m sure square could release a box that was a Final Fantasy 25th anniversary commemorative turd and it would still be snapped up by their fan base. Come to think of it that is what they have done here…

Via Engadget

The f/60 Lens Kitchen Timer

Do you like both photography an cooking? Do you like to have items lying about your house that looks like photography kit but isn’t really then maybe you should buy the The f/60 Lens Kitchen Timer at the Photojojo Store! It’s pretty much what it says on the tin, a kitchen timer that presumably goes up to sixty minutes that looks like an SLR lens.

Unlike the SLR Lens Mugs you can get this one doesn’t seem to be shaped like any particular manufacturer’s lens it just looks like a lens. Still quite cool, I’d consider it if  it went to f/120 I think f/60 is a little limiting.

via PhotoJoJo

Animated Gif of it and some cookies after the break… Continue reading “The f/60 Lens Kitchen Timer”