Writing… What?

Having messed around with I write like I got to thinking that I need to actually get down to doing some writing. I’m not going to get much of a chance to write in the next couple of weeks as I’m going to be going on holiday to China and I’m not taking a computer with me but I think when I get back I’m going to try and make a concerted effort to get some writing done.

I’ve got two incomplete NaNoWriMo stories to finish, and I’ve written snippets here and there for other things. I have a vague Idea what I want to do for my next NaNoWriMo, My first one was going to be a bit cyberpunk, my second was Scifi so my third must be fantasy… I’ve got a vague idea of the world I want to set it in, I’m trying at the moment to take the story from it’s embryonic state in my mind through the and I’m trying to walk it thorough a war-zone of ideas while trying to avoid plagiarism mines.

The basic premise is that it’s been 100 years since the gods fell from power, in that time an empire of man has come into place lead by the descendants of the “Hero” who brought the gods down. Exactly who the gods were, why they had to be brought down is something that no one is entirely clear on, some people reason that there never were any gods at all, and that the Emperors ancestors made the whole thing up.

Some people say that the gods were evil some that they were good, some that there were some good and some evil, there are a hundred and one stories as to why they had to fall and it’s not clear which if any of them are true. All that is known is that at the present, there are no gods and the emperor is becoming a bit of a tyrant.

At the moment I’m trying to figure out in my head what the heck actually happened historically before I go into what’s going to happen. I’d like it to become quite dark, but to be honest knowing me it’s going to be satirical in some way shape or form, in fact thinking about it now I might excuse my accidental plagiarism by stating that the entire work is a satire on the fantasy genre.

Character wise I’ve only got two in mind one is a charlatan “magician” who specializes in sleight of hand and distraction to con people into thinking he has magical powers. As it turns out he does have magical powers much to his surprise. How he gets them and how they manifest I’m not clear on. I do know that magic is uncommon and or non-existent and that has been the case since the gods fell.

The other character is a eccentric old man who is convinced that he is the king of some country somewhere, he just seems to have misplaced his kingdom, and he can’t remember where it is or what it was called. It’s going to be hard to write such a character without him being irritating but I’m going to damn well try.

Both of those characters I’ve unfortunately since coming up with the idea seen parallels to characters in other fantasy works, I’m going to have to try and avoid them being the same. The magician is a bit like Schmendrick from The Last Unicorn, and the old man is a little similar to Fizban from the Dragonlance Novels, hopefully I can steer both characters away from the characters who may or may not have consciously or unconsciously inspired them… I guess there are archetypes and tropes that seem to appear in all kinds of stories, fantasy especially.

I need more characters, I see the now deceased emperor who brought about the godsfall as a strong warrior type, whenever I try to picture him in my mind I see this:

Which is unfortunate, because it’s Conan the barbarian and I don’t want him to be Conan the barbarian, I see him as a reluctant emperor who was thrust into power by dint of being the guy who happened to “Save the Day” on the right day. I guess a bit like Ned Stark from the song of Ice and Fire series by George R.R. Martin? I also see his descendants turning out a bit like some of the Lannisters from the same series, I’m not sure though, the idea is to progress from a just be reluctant ruler to a power crazed tyrant in 2-3 Generations. There might be people about who still remember the old king.

Above I imply that I’m taking inspiration from George R.R. Martin (He who is not your bitch), but I in no way shape or form think I can get even close to how brutal his books are, I’d like to be a little brutal though, I personally think that you can’t make an omelette without breaking some eggs and you can’t make your readers actually fear for the lives of your characters without showing them you are are willing to hurt and or kill them. George RRM is very good at this, he goes through his books on a merry killing spree, maiming and killing characters left right and centre, I doubt I’ll be that harsh, but I’d like to be at least a little harsh.

Another thing I’d Ideally like to take from G.R.R.M. (His name get’s shorter and shorter the more I write it) is the way he manages to make you hate a character in one chapter and love them in the next. As such I’d like to have a much better idea of who all my characters are before I start writing. I’d like it to be the case that although you may not agree with what the “villains” are doing you can at least empathise with them. And if they change from villains to heroes that maybe just maybe you might be able to look beyond their past and forgive them.

I’ve never really tried a character driven story before, my last two NaNo attempts focused on one character, they never changed point of view. Although the more recent one sometimes changed tense from chapter to chapter. I’d like to try and write each chapter from the point of view of a different character, because I think that it’s a really effective way to get the reader to empathise with all your characters, if not all maybe some. I’m not sure I’ve got the talent to do that, switching between characters essentially means you have to change the way you are thinking at the end of every chapter and start thinking in a different way, and you have to remember how you think when you are writing character X as opposed to character Y. I think I’m going to try it though, I’ve got 4 months (I think… Or is it three) to come up with character concepts, I’ll have to move on from there…

This is turning into a bit of a waffle about something that I may or may not write come November, I might just drop this whole train of thought and write a story about vampire cats (Yes I have notes on a concept story about vampire cats…) or something completely different that I think of on the 31st of October…

In the mean time I think I’m going to try and get some more words added to one or other of my NaNoWriMo stories, I don’t think I’ll have the bandwidth time wise to finish one, mainly because I don’t wan to burn out before November, but I’l like to take them both forward at some point. I’m thinking of putting up the rough draft that I have of what I wrote Last November, its just over 9 thousand words long, I’m not sure it’s any good, and I didn’t even get to where (in my head) the story starts.

Anyway on the subject of writing according to I write like this blog post is in the style of (Drum roll)…

I write like
H. P. Lovecraft

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

I think the reason behind that is that it’s written like a diary entry…

Who do you write like?

I did some playing around with a tool called I write like today.  Its a pretty neat little web application that will compare any body of text you give it to a slew of famous authors and tell you who your writing is most like.  I entered in a bunch of chapters from my 2009 NaNoWriMo story and got some odd results.

Apparently I write like Kurt Vonnegut, Margaret Atwood, Chuck Palahniuk, Dan Brown and Steven King. I put a bunch of other blog posts in and got mixed results, lots of Steven King one of my dream journal entries was even compared to Jane Austen, arguably that was about a dream that was set in the same setting as Pride and Prejudice but with a steampunk Iron Man.
I’m not sure how it works out whose writing style you are similar, I assume it compares commonly used vocabulary and sentence structure.

I tested it to see if it could spot the genuine article and it did manage to identify an excerpt from a Margaret Atwood book as having her writing style.

Seems like an interesting toy, I just wish that it had more info on the computational linguistics behind it.

Incidentally this blog post is written in the style of…

I write like
Stephen King

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

I’m Convinced Stephen King is their default we failed to find any patterns in your writing person…

Concept Camera Rubber-Stamp Counterfeiters Wet Dream?

This concept digital camera that turns any picture you take into a rubber stamp is indeed a “Nifty” idea. How you’d go about making one is anyone’s guess maybe it could work with millions of tiny pins like those executive pin toy things. If they can get the resolution good enough this thing would be a counterfeiters wet dream though. need to forge a stamp? Just take a picture of it and hey presto instant duplicate.

More pictures on Petapixel and Yanko Designs respective posts about this.

Via PetaPixel via Yanko Design

Googlemail to Gmail switch has repercussions for android users

At some point in 2007 Google ran into some legal issues which meant that they couldn’t use gmail.com in Europe. because of this when I registered a new Gmail account to use with my Android phone I was assigned an @googlemail.com address rather than an @gmail.com address. I still received messages send to @gmail.com but as far as Google were concerned it was googlemail address.

Last month Google sent out a message to anyone with a googlemail address saying that they could switch their accounts over to gmail.com, which I like many others did. That’s where the problems started. My email works fine, as it always has, however I noticed that for some reason my phone refused to sign into Google Talk, fair enough I never use Google Talk so I just ignored that error message. a while later I noticed that I couldn’t download anything from the Android marketplace. I assumed that there was a network issue as I could quite happily access the market, search it, and queue apps up for download. Only they would never get past the “Starting Download” phase.

It turns out that whatever authentication Google uses seems to have thrown a tizzy because I was no longer @googlemail.com but now @gmail.com. I did a quick hunt and found a support thread which told me what I already suspected. I’ve now switched back to googlemail rebooted my phone and its started downloading a ton of updates so it’s fixed.

Google now have a warning on the page that allows you to switch stating:

Android users: If you use an Android device and change your address, the following apps may not connect properly: Google Talk and Android Market. The current solution for this is to change back to @googlemail.com, or do a full reset of your Android device and use @gmail.com. We are working on resolving this issue as soon as possible.

This would have been useful to know when I switched, but I guess better late than never. If only there was a way to register for an update so I knew when it was safe to switch to Gmail again.

For anyone else who experiences this problem bitter wallet have compiled instructions for how to fix it (I’ve not tested them I haphazardly found the options myself and fixed it but they look about right):

In order to refer Gmail back to googlemail.com

  • On a computer, log into your gmail.
  • Click Settings (top right)
  • Click Accounts and Imports
  • At the bottom, next to ‘Change Account Settings’, click on ‘Google Account Settings’.
  • On the opened page it will tell you near the top whether you have a gmail or googlemail address.
  • Go back to the previous page, next to ’send mail as’ there is a small ’switch to gmail?’ link, click this.
  • Then, click the link that says ‘go back to googlemail’, then on the next page click the next button to confirm (I think it’s the big blue button).
  • Then click on the ‘Google Account Settings’ link from the earlier step, this should now confirm you are back on a googlemail account.

I hope this is useful to someone.

That’s one hell of a discount…

I was looking at a Wide angle Lens on Amazon.co.uk after reading this article at digital photography school. At first I thought the price was a bit high given that DPS listed the Lens at just $400, then I noticed the RRP of this lens… 6 AND A QUARTER MILLION POUNDS!

With that kind of discount this lens is a total steal! Although I’m a bit sceptical about the %100 saving, thats not how maths works, we have this invention called fractions.

Eizo Pin-up Calendar 2010 X-Ray Nudes

Eizo who are a company that make monitors for medical imaging have released a calendar of nudes with a difference. I like the style of this, it’s clever and it’s just about safe for work.

Via  Ufunk.net ( Who seem to have taken down all the images…)

Also Via Ads of the World

I can’t seem to find the images anywhere any more…

Cool Lichtenstein Pop Art make up

Not the first time I’ve seen images of make up like this but I think it looks awesome. I’ve noticed a growing trend of artists trying to make real life look like pictures rather than making pictures that look like real life. I really Like this image and I just wanted to share it.

via this isn’t happiness.™ Peter Nidzgorski, tumblr.

This should be on every applicable door

Otherwise how are we to know?

Via this isn’t happiness.™ Peter Nidzgorski, tumblr.

Mac Classic iPad Stand

This is possibly the only way I could justify buying an iPad. Hirac a Japanese modder has  converted an old Mac Classic into an iPad stand, it looks amazing.

The older Macs will always hold a special place in my heart, I’m a reformed member of the cult of Jobs, from way back before it was hip to own an Apple computer.

It looks perfect, almost as if it was made for it.

Via  hirac.

This is how I feel today…

So tired, head not working…

Via frkncngz.

Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported
This work by Omar Kooheji is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported.