NaNoWriMo 2008: Chapter 7

Bugger I forgot to post this yesterday evening, Today begins the new Nano… Maybe… I might have to start tomorrow because I’m a little busy…
If you are looking for the previous Chapters can find them here:

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4,Chapter 5 Chapter 6

“There was only one thing to do when life is going this badly” Blank thought aloud to himself. “Make tea”

Blank packed away his shopping and set the kettle on, he was glad for once that he had a bog standard kettle, he had had his fill of household items that talked back, all he ever wanted his kettle to do was boil water, which it did admirably.

Blank got out his favourite mug, put a teabag in it and considered for the millions time in his life adding the milk before the water, but decided against it, and patiently waited for the kettle to boil.

The kettle clicked it’s self off, and as blank was reaching for the kettle to pour the water into his mug and continue his tea making ritual he heard the unfamiliar sound of his doorbell.


Blank had one of the most advanced doorbells you could get, it had the option to play any of a hundred or so melodies, or any sound clip you chose to upload to it, after careful deliberation and having decided that every single one of it’s “melodies” was insanely irritating Blank had decided to go for the simple and yet effective, “Ding Dong” sound. He felt in encapsulated all that a doorbell should be, and was the least likely sound do drive him crazy.

Not that the sound his doorbell made mattered very much. Blank seldom entertained guests, and when he did have people round they tended to be coming in with him, so Blank rarely heard his doorbell go off. As such it took him a couple of confused seconds to realize what it was. His carefully choreographed tea making ritual ruined by the disruptive doorbell Blank decided that the Tea could wait a moment as he found out who was at his door.

As Blank tentatively paced towards the door, not really knowing what to expect, he thought of all the possibilities of whom might be waiting on the other side of the door.

Part of him hoped it was Lucy, come to take him back, he immediately pushed that thought out of his head. The last she’d heard of her she was moving on, due to his own lack of interest. Maybe if he called her he could straighten things out, they might have a small fight, but maybe it would end well, probably not though.

Another part of him, albeit a small part wondered if it was someone with a brief case full of cash waiting to tell him he’d won the lottery or something. Blank knew that this was even more unlikely than it being Lucy though as he never played the lottery, as he saw it the lottery was a tax on people who were bad at statistics. And Blank wasn’t bad at statistics, He’d done a stats module at university; He may have had to resit it three times but he’d passed eventually and that was proof enough that he wasn’t bad at statistics… Just Mediocre…

A third part of his mind worried that it was some murderous villain looking to kill whomever they found in the flat and take up residence there to perform some nefarious deeds, this was highly unlikely but probably more likely than his other two ideas.

Blank resolved that he had no idea who was on the other side of the door, and the only way he would ever find out was to continue opening the door and see for himself, as no amount of postulating would change the inevitable outcome, unless he spent too long postulating and the person on the other side of the door got bored and left, which could be good or bad depending on who was on the other side of the door.

At that thought, Blank became aware that with every second he spent considering this outcome the likely hood that the person on the other side would in fact just assume he wasn’t there and leave increased. Deciding that in case it was Lucy or the Lottery man Blank started to open the door, but he tensed himself ready for action should it be a villainous murdered, exactly what action he was readying himself for he wasn’t sure, but he was damn well ready.

All of Blanks readiness Dissolved into nothingness as he saw who was waiting on the other side of the door.

It was “Her”. The woman from the shopping market, the woman Blank never thought he’d see again.

Maybe she had been eyeing him up?

But how had she found him?

It had only been a half an hour since he’d left the market, there was no way she could have found out where he lived in that amount of time.

Maybe she was some scary stalker?

Maybe she was the murderous villain he’d been ready for, but wasn’t anymore because she’d thrown him off guard by being her and not some other murderous villain?

Blank tried to remember what he was intending to do in case the person on the other side of the door was a murderous villain and couldn’t come up with anything. The best he could manage was “Uh… Hello?”

“Hi, I need to talk to you. This may sound strange, but I need your help” She said.

Blank stared at her expressionlessly for a few seconds trying to think what it could possibly be that she would need him to do for her.

“Uh… Okay, I guess, what do you need me to do?”

“I can’t talk about it here; you’ll have to trust me. Can you come with me now? I’ll be able to explain it all when we get there”

“Come with you where? I’m not sure I… Uh… What is this about?”

“Look if you come with me I’ll be able to explain it all, I just… Can’t talk about it here. Someone might be listening.” She looked around apprehensively “Are you coming with me or not?”

Blank weighed moping about his flat by himself thinking about how rubbish his life had suddenly become in the last few hours against going out to help this attractive blonde woman. He was struggling to think of a single thing that made the former had going for it that wasn’t over shadowed by the fact that he’d be leaving his flat with this attractive blonde woman.

In fact he struggled to think of a single thing that the former had going for it at all.

“Okay, give me a couple of secs to grab my keys and my wallet and I’ll be right out” Blank grabbed his stuff and as he was locking the door one thing did occur to him that his flat had going for it, tea, he paused and thought maybe he should invite her in for tea before the left.

“Come on we have to go now” She said turning away from him and walking towards the lift.

Maybe not then, hopefully there would be tea wherever she was taking him.

NaNoWriMo 2008: Chapter 6

I almost forgot to post this… Last one tomorrow, then Nano 09 begins…
If you are looking for the previous Chapters can find them here:

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4,Chapter 5

The bus ride home had been completely uneventful, just the way Blank liked it. He’d even managed to avoid bursting any of his shopping bags on the way home, which was a plus.

As Blank approached the door to his flat he noticed a sheet of paper hanging on his door. Probably a note from one of the neighbours, Blank thought. The fact that Blank had had absolutely no interaction with any of his neighbours in the three or so years he’d been living there didn’t occur to Blank until he got close enough read the heading on the paper… It was from his landlord…


For The ATTN: Blank Munchausen: (Typography Note: His name is in a font that looks like handwriting)

Please verify identity to read Further

It was probably just a notice to tell Blank the rent was going up or something like that; Blank kept himself to himself, never played loud music or had friends over for that matter, except Lucy… And that wasn’t likely to happen again.

Blank let himself in and went to his “Study” to read the notice; it was more of a cupboard with just enough room for a desk and a bookshelf, but blank had always wanted a study so as far as he was concerned that was what it was.

Blank scanned his thumb over the print reader on the paper, it took him several times to get it to register that it was to him that the letter was addressed.


For The ATTN: Blank Munchausen.

Dear Mr/Mrs/Ms/Dr/Sir/Master Munchausen,

Despite it being message that had been sent out by a computer Blank was almost always amused that his landlords tried to give it a personal touch by altering the font of his name and adding in the greetings which would never apply to him, only to cross them out.

It is with great regretification that we write to inform you that your residing at this address will soon have to be terminated. The building which your flat is apart of has been sought after by a development firm, who have offered me a sum of monies I would rather not disclose for the reason of purchasing the flat in which you are residing, and we have agreed.

It took Blank a couple of attempts to decipher the first paragraph, but her really didn’t like where this was going

In according with your agreement of lease I hereby give you 1 months notice that you have to vacate the property.

“Oh Shit!” was all blank could manage as he read on.

At the end of the month the building is being demolished, by the company mentioned above, as such having notified you of such circumstances we hereby absolve ourselves of any responsibility to the safety of your belongings at the end of the months period expiring.

At least they’d given him a month to move out, Blank wasn’t sure he could find another place to live in that amount of time though. Having just lost his job meant he’d have loads more spare time to do so, but it also meant he’d have to explain to any perspective landlord where the rent was going to coming from…

Prior to the building being demolished I am assured that the above mentioned development firm who prefer to for the time being remain unnamed has assured us that they will check to see that there is no one in the building, so you need not fear of the building being torn down around you, unless you are a very heavy sleeper.

Blank wasn’t worried about being a heavy sleeper so much that his alarm clock wouldn’t bother to wake him up in time to move out. It was that damn things fault he’d lost his job today, Blank was considering just leaving it in the flat when he did move out.

We are sorry for any convenience this may place you in,

Sincerely yours,

The Team at Flexibly Living Inc.

Great Blank thought, today he’d gone from being a little late to work to being unemployed, single, and soon to be homeless… And it was only 8 O’Clock.

NaNoWriMo 2008: Chapter 5

So I’m doing a rubbish job of posting these Daily… My initial Intent was to post one a day in the run up to the end of the month… I have a day’s slack time though so I’m not going to post 2 today.

If you are looking for the previous Chapters can find them here:

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

Arriving at the market blank swiped his shopping list at the kiosk and it printed out a map of where to get all the items on his shopping list. It was supposedly the most optimal path through his shopping list, apart from the few sponsored items, which had been added to his route. He’d had the option of opting out of these “sponsored” items being on his route, but he would have had to have paid for the premium service for that, and Blank was sure he could just ignore the stuff he didn’t want… Although, he thought, looking at the map that he might actually want some doughnuts, and he’d never tried marshmallow Silly’O’s before… Maybe he’d pick them up on his way round, they were after all on his route…

Somewhere between the Tea and the sugar Blank noticed that there was a blonde woman that seemed to be looking at him oddly, she might even have been following him. That was ludicrous, people didn’t follow other people in super markets, but everywhere he went after that he saw her. The chances of their shopping maps being the same was almost statistically impossible, Blank knew that… but it was only almost, impossible, and she was a good looking woman, maybe she was checking him out… Unlikely, but his day had been so shit so far maybe he was cashing in a karmic cheque to compensate for his rubbish day… Maybe it was just coincidence, Blank smiled at her as he passed her and the tinned tomatoes, she hastily looked away, and pushed her trolley off looking embarrassed, he didn’t see her again for the rest of his shopping trip.

Great, he thought; he’d scared her away. It was typical of the day he’d been having. Blank continued along his route around the market, he briefly considered deviating to avoid the Silly’O’s but ending up picking them up anyway out of curiosity.

As Blank walked out the door of the supermarket the handle of his trolley displayed the amount that would be debited from his account and asked him to confirm it, it was slightly more than he was expecting but he had a discount code from his work which would make it okay. Blank punched in the discount code waited for a couple of seconds and was surprised to see it come up as rejected. HR had obviously been working overtime today, he’d only been sacked at 5… Oh well, he couldn’t be bothered going back and dropping off any items he’d picked up so he pushed the cart into the bagging machine and went to the other side to wait for his stuff, he could have bagged it himself, but he paid a monthly subscription for the service as it saved him so much time.

As he approached the conveyor belt, where his shopping would pop out he noticed the same blonde woman he’d seen earlier, she’d obviously noticed him as well because the second he looked at her, her head spun around in to look in the opposite direction and she hurried off, almost forgetting her shopping. Blank could see she was obviously out of his league, her shopping had been packed in the special premium bags with padded handles and a lining that kept your food cold. This was a stark contrast to the crap plastic ones his shopping was coming out in, with the handles that ripped your hands to shreds and the plastic that was so thin that blank had never made it home without at least one bag bursting and spilling its contents on the floor.

She was heading to the car park too which meant she could afford to run a car, or had a company car which although not completely uncommon was quite rare these days, Blank couldn’t remember the last time he’d been in an car that wasn’t a taxi, and they just weren’t the same. One time when he was young he’d gone on holiday with his parents and they’d stayed with one of his dads friends from school who was filthy rich. He’d had a car; and not just any car, it was one of the ones you actually drove yourself not an autocar like the ones you usually saw on the streets.

Blank resolved that his chances with her were so infinitesimally small that he shouldn’t even think about it. But… She’d been looking at him… Hadn’t she?

NaNoWriMo 2008: Chapter 4

This is my attempt at publishing what there is of my attempt at NaNoWriMo last year in the run up to this years NaNoWriMo.It could have gone worse, well maybe not.

If you are looking for the previous Chapters can find them here:

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3

Blank got on the bus, which would take him to the market; it was empty aside from a couple of teenage girls one of whom was playing music on her mobile phone. Blank was convinced it was louder than some nightclubs he’d been to, and secretly wished they’d ban the mobile phone companies from putting sub-woofers on phones, it was overkill, and it defeated the purpose of a personal communication device.

He also wished he had the power to hand out anti-social behaviour notices to people who played music that sounded like someone was strangling a chipmunk with a steam engine roaring in the background, how could they call that music.

Seething in his seat, Blank did nothing.

NaNoWriMo 2008: Chapter 1

This is my attempt at publishing what there is of my attempt at NaNoWriMo last year in the run up to this years NaNoWriMo.

“Shit! Shit! Shit!” Blank muttered under his breath, he was running across the lobby of the office building and he could see the lift doors starting to close.

“Hold the Door” he shouted but the lift took no notice, had better things to do than pander to his needs.

Blank hated lifts, especially this one, it had a mind of its own and had a creepy tendency to hang about the 23rd floor, and Blank was convinced it was chatting up the Coke machine on that floor.

Blank managed to reach the lift with just enough time to stick his arm between the doors, but they didn’t stop closing.

“Owww! You’re supposed to stop closing the doors when something gets between them!”

“Sorry” The lift said insincerely “I didn’t see you there. Did you want to come in?”

“What gave you that impression? My shouting at you to hold the door, my sprinting towards you, or my sticking my arm between your doors trying to keep them open only to have it crushed?”

“How am I supposed to know if you want to come in? I’ve not been programmed with an intricate understanding of human body language. All I know is that if you want me to give you a ride you push one of the buttons on the wall outside.”

“Well it would have been difficult to push the button from across the lobby wasn’t it? Open the door and let me in, I’m late enough as it is” Blank said realising that he must look ridiculous arguing with the lift with his arm stuck in between the doors. “Don’t you have some where to be anyway? Weren’t you answering a call on another floor?”

“Not really, I’d Just gotten bore of hanging about here, everyone one is normally in their offices at this point any way. So I was heading to the 23rd floor to have a chat with the Coke machine.” Blank knew it! “Besides it’s your own fault you are late. Not mine”.

“Actually it’s not. My alarm clock slept in this morning and woke me up an hour later than I’d told it to”

“Pah, you always people always blame it on us machines, I’m sure she had a perfectly good reason you probably kept her up all night”

Blank wasn’t in the mood to argue, he was late enough as it was and this was only making him later. “Look you are probably right, I was up quite late preparing the some charts for a presentation I’ve got to give today on the effectiveness of charts in company presentations. But that’s beside the point. Can I please come in, and will you please take me to the 25th floor, I’ve got a meeting that starts in 20 minutes and I don’t want to be late for that”

“You’ve got 20 minutes have you…? Well I tell you what I’m going to the 23rd floor, I’ll drop you off there, and then I’m going on a break. You can take the stairs up two floors; you look like you need the exercise”

“Okay” Blank gave up, he’d had a similar argument with the lift before, there was no way to win it and he was just getting later and later. It was a good thing he had an understanding boss, hopefully he’d just have to stay in a little later to make up for being late.

The lift pulled up to the 23rd floor opened its doors and the out of order light flashed on. As Blank walked out the lift he noticed that the Coke machine had also gone out of order, and he wondered to himself exactly what the lift and the coke machine did together.

The walk up to the 25th floor wasn’t that bad, the stairway was kept clinically clean, mainly because no one but him and the Janitors ever used them. He was just glad that the lift was finished with its fling with the coffee machine on the 10th floor.

As Blank arrived at his desk he noticed there was a note on his monitor which had the text “1 New Message” flashing on it. He’d gotten the interactive post it notes as a Secret Santa gift two Christmas’s ago, but had never used them. He had no idea who’d given it to him, but he really wished he’d been given something a little more useful.

He clicked on the note with his finger and a message popped up asking him for his personal pin number. He didn’t remember setting a pin number on it, but he’d gotten it just over two years ago so he assumed he’d forgotten about it.

Blank searched his desk for the user manual for the post-it note which he found under the stand for his monitor, and flicked through it looking for any reference to the default pin.

Eventually 30 pages into the tome he found that the pin was written on the inside of the box the post-it note came in. After another five minutes of rooting through his desk Blank finally found the box crushed under a pile of paper, he looked inside the box and surely enough there was a sticker with the pin for the post-it note:

Auto Post-it Pin Number: 0-0-0-0

Why that couldn’t have been listed in the manual, Blank had no idea, he punched the pin into the post it note and after an irritatingly long animated intro, it displayed a message.


I come round to your desk to speak to you about the presentation this morning only to find you weren’t here.

This is the fifth time this month you’ve been come in late. We need to talk about this.

Can you come round to my office when you are done with the presentation?


Mike was Blanks boss generally a nice guy, but you didn’t want to get on his bad side, Blank would have to swing round after the Presentation and Iron things out.

“Oh Shit! The Presentation!” Blanks hand flew to his forehead, he glanced down at his desk clock, he was 3 minutes late, and the presentation was in a meeting room on the 21st floor. He grabbed his laptop and made for the stairs, as he passed the Lift he noted that it was still on the 23rd floor and wondered again what on earth the lift was doing to that Coke machine.

NaNoWriMo 2008: Daily Chapters

I failed to complete NaNoWriMo last year but I did like where the story was going. So in the interest of getting an idea of how I was doing last year I’m going to post a chapter a day starting tomorrow, I wrote 7 chapters in Total, I’m not even sure that the 7th chapter was completed as I don’t have it to hand at the moment.

Anyway I’d appreciate any comments any one has on it. Some of the Chapters are only a couple of paragraphs long some of them are a few pages worth, none of them have been edited and they are as dumped from my brain to a word processor, probably missing some of the formatting as I’m not sure I can replicate everything I did in MS Word in WordPress…

I don’t mind people criticizing it but please don’t rip it to shreds, it’s taken a bit of courage for me me to just publish an embryonic work of fiction on the web for the world to see.

I’m going to release this story under a “Creative Commons Attribution-Non-Commercial-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales Licence.” Which means anyone is free to to copy, distribute, display, and perform the work so long as you give me credit, are not using it for commercial purposes and don’t alter, transform, or build upon it.

If anyone is interested in further licencing it you can contact me by posting a comment on any of the pages.

Creative Commons License
This work is licenced under a Creative Commons Licence.